Monday, January 31, 2005

Three Sheets to the Wind

The only way to get through State of the Union addresses lately has been to be drinking. Liberally, as a matter of fact.

But any game involving tossing one back when you hear "freedom," "democracy," or "tyranny" won't feel like a good idea on Thursday morning when the alarm goes off. I'd like to suggest an alternative.

To begin with, get out all your socks and make them into nice, compact rolls. Place them in a large basket within arm's reach. Then, every time the Preznit says something really stupid just throw a sock at the screen. You should be through with the pile before the third "spontaneous" standing ovation.

Then you can start drinking. Liberally.


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